Am I a Fat Girl At Heart?

All my life, I've been thin. In high school, I was 95 pounds. In college, I was 104 pounds. When I got married, I was 100 pounds. Basically, a size zero (petite) for most of my life. After my daughter was born I was 110 pounds. After my son was born, I was a depressing 130 pounds for the first 3 months of his life...ugh. Sadness for me. Lately, I've miraculously been slimming down even though I'm eating like a pig (perhaps attributed to breast feeding).

I am now 115 pounds. Still heavy for me but livable and I can cope with it. I'm sure I'll lose at least 5 more pounds eventually (when I stop breast feeding and my boobs deflate to "saggy ball sacks" as my sister in law calls them). But lately, I've been having these dreams...about food! Just the other night, I dreamt of eating Nestle Tollhouse cookies and gorging myself on Nestle Tollhouse ice cream sandwiches. Mmmhm. My tummy grumbles just thinking about it. A few days before my cookie dream, I also dreamt about eating a big juicy steak (this after I've decided to give up eating red meat again).

So, I tell my hubby about my recent dreams and he says that I'm having fat girl dreams. Which leads me back to that question again... am I a fat girl at heart? My hubby was so kind to entertain my fat girl dreams by baking me some Nestle Tollhouse cookies last Sunday. Incidentally-- while eating my yummy cookies, my daughter (the regulator), came up to me and said "Mommy, if you eat too many cookies, you gonna be a fat girl."

Hmm. I only have myself to blame for this--this is what I tell her will happen if she eats too much junk food. I guess in the wise words of many but most recently Sexy Back--Justin Timberlake: "What Goes Around Comes Around."