Are These the Rules?

When I was in college, I was in a sorority. It was my first experience in a women's group and I didn't know what to expect. In my sorority there were about 120 young women (I think these days, my sorority has closer to 200 women because the number of sororities has dwindled). It's supposed to be a sisterhood but quite often, there were quite a few arguments and some ladies that just didn't get along. Perhaps it's as simple as there being too many "queen bees" in a nest. There were power struggles, disputes about guys, stealing, people eating other people's food, revenge, the whole gamut of crazy stuff and not to mention the gossip.

I almost feel like this is the norm when you get a large group of women together. I've seen the same kind of things going on in the mom groups that I belong to. Women get catty and often they get mean. Now, granted it's a little bit more subtle, as we get older. It's more of the passive aggressive kind of stuff. After having kids, you'd think that we'd be better people but many of us are not. I think I'm a better person after having children and I try to teach my children not to be mean, but sometimes I wonder if it will work. After all these years and all the different parenting books/techniques that have been introduced, it almost seems like we as a society are no better than we were 30 years ago. In fact it almost seems worse with the introduction of the internet into the picture. People still get terrorized.

I mean really people let's get a life and act a little bit more mature. In my mom's group alone, a couple really surprising incidents happened. One mom-- a great mom that is completely involved and absolutely nice person was treated rudely despite all the work she put into the club. Another mom-- a smart, amazing, fantastic mom that fosters so much imagination in her children, received horribly mean anonymous letters. It's all so petty and annoying.

So STOP!! Make a decision to make it stop with you and remember that the bystander is almost as guilty as the bully.

A Lecture

About a month ago, I went down to San Diego to visit my best friend from high school. My kids love both her and her husband as if they were their Aunt and Uncle. We stayed there overnight and she got to see inside my chaotic, whiny, temper tantrum and crying filled world. That may be why, before we left, she gave me a book about living life. She gave me Randy Pausch's book, titled "The Last Lecture."

I had heard of him previously around the time that he passed away. The last lecture of this Carnegie Mellon professor was circulating around YouTube like wildfire. I saw bits and pieces of it but I never actually SAW the lecture. After reading the book, I would definitely like to see his last lecture. I found the book to be quite inspiring. It's about a man that is trying to enjoy life and help others enjoy life despite the his grim pancreatic cancer diagnosis. His love of life could be seen in spite of his cancer within this book and in his last lecture, which was ultimately for his young children to see. It's filled with many life lessons that are useful to any person at any stage of their life...a teenager, a recent college graduate, and even a mother of three that sometimes loses track of time. :)

I think Randy Pausch's life lessons and legacy for his children can be best summed up with a quote from the end of the book:

"It's not about how you achieve your dreams. It's about how to lead your life. If you lead your life the right way, the Karma will take care of itself. The dreams will come to you."

So, with Mr. Pausch's words in mind, live your life well, do the right thing and be an awesome role model for your children.

Freeze!

Last week, my husband and I took the kids to Disneyland. During the ride there, I looked back at the kids and saw the excitement on their faces. It was all they could talk about. At that moment, I just wanted to freeze time and keep them little forever. Everything has flown by so quickly. I can't believe I have THREE children and the eldest one is Kindergarten age.

The ages that they are right now are absolutely perfect:

The Princess is old enough to be a little independent and be a big helper. Everyday, I ask her to help me do things...and she actually says YES! Granted, there are times when she chooses to ignore me, but for the most part, she does what I ask. She's also learning to read (Bob level books) and it's so exciting to me. I'm hoping she learns to enjoy books as much as I do.

Jr. Peanut is now 2 and a half. He's still little and I absolutely LOVE the way he talks. When he's watching a DVD and I need to press play, he always shouts out "Mama come press butt". Or how he covers his right eye with his hand and says "I'm a pirate." It's also fascinating to see how his mind works and let me tell ya, it's totally different from how girls think. He's just so cute these days that I always feel this need to just pick him up and cuddle him (much to his annoyance).

Little Sissy is now 7 months. She definitly is developing her personality. She's still little enough that I can easily hold her and I love the squeals she makes when I tickle her belly. I love the baby smell that she still has and the way her face lights up when she sees me.

They are so fun. I hope I remember these days forever (although at the rate that my memory is failing me...I may not).